SIP Movie Review Blog

Just saw a movie that is the third in a very successful series, Transformers, Dark of the Moon. It stars lots of folks from the first two: Shia Lebeouf (Sam), Kevin Dunn and Julie White (his parents), Josh Duhamel (from TV’s Las Vegas), and returning as the conspiracy theory expert, John Turturro. We also have newbies: Rosie Huntington-Whiteley (Victoria’s Secret Model taking the place of Megan Fox), Patric Dempsey (from TV’s Gray’s Anatomy), Francis McDormand (Fargo, Burn After Reading), John Malkovich (Con Air, Burn After Reading), and Ken Jeong (Hangover 1 & 2).

The story, the Autobots had a war going on with the Decepticons on planet Cybertron. The Autobots had set out on a ship called the Ark, when it was shot down and crashed on the moon. Yes, our moon. The US government discovered this and that is why the race to the moon came up in the the 60s. We went and brought back samples, but further missions were cancelled.

Flash forward to today, the Autobots are working with the US military in the NEST operation, trying to stamp out colonies of the Decepticons. They get a call to investigate terrorist problems at Chernobyl. There they find a giant robot drilling rig and a fuel cell from the Ark. So they head back to ask the US military what up. Francis McDormand plays the Secretary of Defense, she tells them the real reason for the moon shots in the 60s. Prime and Rachet take a ship to the moon to see what is left, find the barely alive Sentinal Prime, Leonard Nemoy. Now it gets crazy.

I’ll try to hurry, be aware; this is a 3 hour movie! Just when you think it is done, it starts a new chapter. So Autobot Prime brings Nemoy back to NEST to ask him some questions. Turns out he had made a deal with the Decepticons to rebuild his planet, and he turns traitor. The Decepticons needed him alive and the 5 pillars that powered up their army, now they have him there in NEST. Soon he has fired up a space bridge, bringing in more robots for the conflict. We see new robot things, even bigger and badder than before.

Back to Shia (Sam Witwicky). He has graduated college, got him a new girl, and now needs a job. Finds work at a defense contractor, run by John Malkovich. Shia is the mail room guy, meets the new girl who works for Patrick Dempsey, a jealous boss. So we have a cool guy versus the rich guy contest. Shia meets Ken Jeong, a co-employee, who has taken the conspiracy theory to new heights. As he shares what he has found out about moon landings, etc. he is killed by a Decepticon. Right there in front of Sam, a big surprise. Sam and the military begin to investigate the space shot program, turns out the Russians were going back several times, all those missions were cancelled. Everyone connected with that program has had an accident.

Now the movie gets into full battle armor. We have new, more advanced robots, entire cities destroyed, I understand Michael Bay blew up several hundred cars alone in the robot fights. It does get a little long, and we were tired and parts of our bodies had fallen asleep. But I’ll try to capture the action in a few sentences. We have a full scale war, Nemoy has brought in lots of robots, they take over, demand that the Autobots be kicked off the planet. The military approves it, the Autobots are loaded up and shot off into space. But the Deceptions shoot down the rocket, what are we to do? The conflict moves to Chicago, where we have robots taking over the entire city, causing complete chaos.

Surprise, the Autobots re-appear, and we have a royal battle on our hands. Not gonna tell you more, it just wouldn’t be right. It is an enjoyable movie, just had a lot of noise and robot clashes, and it is about 45 minutes too long. 3 Autobots.